Saturday, January 30, 2010

Take something from the fog...


















Guess where she got those big brown eyes?

So "mama" in English of course is mother but in Turkish it means baby food, nursing etc. and is actually also used for pet food.

I refer to my husband as "baba"-daddy when I speak to baby girl about him and he is trying to use "mama' but usually slips to say "anne"-Turkish for mother since mama has that double meaning. He's trying...

I just would like her to refer to me as "mama"- the mother I know not Anne but I bet it will all work out- We are doing well adjusting to the flow of our little family...

Below are lovely words that Keryn at eighty days design had posted and I needed to share with others...Also check out her great pictures and gorgeous cards...

"When we feel muddled and unfocused, unsure of which way to turn, we say we are in a fog. Similar to when we are in a fog in nature, we may feel like we can’t see where we’re going or where we’ve come from, and we’re afraid if we move too quickly we might run into something hidden in the mists that seem to surround us. Being in a fog necessarily slows us down by limiting our visibility. The best choice may be to pull over and wait for the murkiness to clear. If we move at all, we must go slowly, feeling our way and keeping our eyes open for shapes emerging from the haze, perhaps relying on the taillights of someone in front of us as we make our way along the road. By and large, most of us prefer to be able to see where we are going and move steadfastly in that direction, but there are gifts that come from being in a fog. Sometimes it takes an obstacle like fog to get us to stop and be still in the moment, doing nothing. In this moment of involuntary inactivity, we may look within and find that the source of our fogginess is inside us; it could be some emotional issue that needs tending before we can safely go full steam ahead.


Being in a fog reminds us that when we cannot see outside ourselves, we can always make progress by looking within. Then again, the fog may simply be teaching us important lessons about how to continue moving forward with extreme caution, harnessing our attention, watching closely for new information, and being ready to stop on a dime. We cannot predict when a fog will come, nor can we know for certain when it will lift, but we can center ourselves in the haze and wait for guidance. We may find it inside ourselves or in a pair of barely visible taillights just ahead. Whether we follow the lights out of the fog, wait for a gentle breeze to lift it, or allow the sun to burn it away, we can rest certain that one way or another, we will move forward with clarity once again"

Words from Daily Om

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Back in Turkey













We made it safely back to Turkey after our four months in Minnesota. As I have said a million times it is so bittersweet but back in Baba's arms, with my husband, to be our little family. As we know fathers are so important and my husband needs a chance to learn to be a good one and baby dear needs to bond!

It took me a little longer to get over jet lag since can't sleep when I want revolves around my little miss Mavisu. She is back on her schedule now too thank goodness.

We moved into a new house and are back living in Eskişehir. Ç found us a big house I think to welcome us back and make me feel better about coming back. We need to be in one place for a while. It is an American style house with a garage, basement, bathtubs and vaulted ceilings. It is nice just a little overwhelming to be unpacking and cleaning with a baby but slowly slowly...different priorities now different pace.

Being new parents my husband and I have found a whole new respect for our parents. It is hard stuff, parenting this little being that is completely dependent on you, all encompassing and completely beautiful:)

It is such a learning process with a steep learning curve. I had a chance to start learning with the help of my momma but now we have to work together as parents!

The last two nights she has had a couple crying fits during the evening time...her time to mootz(have spelled that correctly mother?)...a fussier time. She is a really good baby but sometimes she gets a little fire inside her and not much can help except nans(nursing) and if not that then-fresh air. It is funny she can be ballllling and then the second we step outside she quits. We tried almost everything possible last night indoors then Ç suggested car ride- perfect!

We all got bundled up. Hit the fresh air- stopped crying! Hopped in the car-silence is truely golden. We were so relaxed because of the silence Ç joked we should just start living in the car. Put a little table in the middle- eat there- maybe take turns driving-sleeping- I was cracking up!

The funny thing about Baby girl loving the cold is the Turks fear of it(talked about in previous posts). I took her for a little baby bjorn walk all bundled up in her snow suit with hat, gloves etc. to the market yesterday for her sake and mine(must get out of the house sometimes!). And I anticipated this happening but the second I was in speaking distance to a Turkish woman she says to me "napiyorsun kizim, çok soğak!" -"what are you doing my girl, so cold!" I tried to explain that her snow suit was thick but couldn't think of the word for thick(just found it-kalın- really diving into learning the language!) and it just came out as "buyuk"-big but after that just smiled and let the woman look at our beautiful little child and continue on her way muttering about how cold it is...

The above photo was after a 2 hours inconsolible crying bout where I had her in the front sling with a blanket around us both standing outside swaying and singing at the top of my lungs(hello new neighboors:) until she finally fell asleep sucking her thumb looking rather angelic. And as frustrated as I was and as BAD AS MY BACK HURTS ohhh I love that little girl! Maşallah!

Found this from babycenter.com
After the intensity of adjusting to life with a new baby, many parents reach a point where they find they're like ostriches lifting their heads out of the sand to discover a wider world — the one they took leave of, temporarily, after the birth. The repetitiveness and endlessness of baby care can also be very different from the pace of work, especially if you're used to a goal-oriented job or lots of adult interaction


I think my head is starting...slowly to lift...



If you can't read it that well go here

must go baby girl is awake and baba needs a lesson on our cloth diapers!

xoxo thanks to those who still read!

Monday, January 4, 2010

I can't believe...













I can't believe our little beauty, biggest doll girl is 4 months today.

I can't believe it is 2010. Happy New year...new decade to all!

I can't believe how 2009 was the best and worst year of my life, the circle of life.

Feel so fortunate for it all...thanks.

We will be headed back to Turkey soon to be with my wonderful patient husband.

All so bittersweet...