Traditions...

When I was younger I never thought I was a good writer. Then I took my first college english course and the teacher kept telling me to "write what you know." I wrote about our Johnson family Christmas tree hunt with my father as the leader of our pack...can't find the original story but the memories are always strong...especially this time of the year...strong family tradtion...

Every year shortly after Thanksgiving KAJman(our dad) would dawn his bright orange hunting hat signaling it was time for the hunt...hunt for the year's trophy 18 foot Christmas tree.

Our family would get all bundled up, boots, hats, mittens, down jackets, scarves up to our eyes...four children plump from all the layers loaded into the "woody" station wagon all fighting for the back seat. The hidden seat in the trunk so you looked out at the cars behind you. After all settled into our positions, dad prepared with a full 12 pack of Diet Coke under his legs or was it the megaswig stage at this time? Dad would turn the inginition and we were off up the highway to some remote tree farm in northern minnesota where my dad knew we would find the perfect tree.


















My parents house has gorgeous 18 ft. ceilings in the living room and my father placed special hooks so the tree sat perfectly in the middle of the stained glass window. Gorgeous every year...

This year is different with our missing link. We decided to put the tree outside this year and decorate with popcorn and cranberry strings, pinecones with peanutbutter and birdseed, all food for the birds. As the topper we used dad's signature bright orange stocking cap as our shining star tree topper, our angel!!!!

We love you dad!

Also Mavisu is growing more beautiful everyday! She just got over her first cold and we are getting eager to see her daddy when we go back to Turkey in January.

Hope all are having a good holiday season whatever holidays you celebrate! Hope it is filled with love and time to be with those loved ones! xoxo


















Mavisu is getting ready...with her party dress on! Will take picks of the outside tree soon.

Yep...

She just keeps getting cuter:)

Mercy home foundation...

One of my dearest friends, Trinea is doing a round the world trip. She has currently stopped off in India to work with a non-profit named Mercy Home Foundation who helps take care of women who would other wise have no where else to go. They all have some varying form of autism or other mental disorders but are basically all grouped together since they lack funding for doctors to diagnose let alone treat them.

They need basic necessities most of all and a place to feel safe, warm and home!!!

Please read more of Trinea's journey at http://itstrinea.com/ and donate whatever you can at mercy home foundation

The above photo is from when Trinea visited me in Turkey. We are standing in front of the Sultanahmet, Blue Mosque on a spring day.

We are lucky girls to have been born healthy and safe with loving families!

Elimination communication; ie: baby potty training!

Ok so I heard about this from my sister...she had been in Costa Rica for the summer working at this enviromental learning center, Rancho Mastatal in the jungle... pretty sweet but that is a different story.

She told me how the little girl who was only one year old would use a hand signal when she needed to use the potty. She can't talk yet but is signally for the potty! My sister suggested I teach Mavisu to do the same.

At first I thought it seemed a bit crazy, let's be honest but was willing to at least read the book and give it a try.

I got the book from the library and it took me forever to read as I have a newborn and life is on baby time...how does the time fly by? (oh but I love her so much!)Tip to new moms...have it close to you for everytime you breast feed you can read.

So I read Ingrid Bauer's book, Diaper free! The Gentle Wisdom of Natural Infant Hygeine. and it made a lot of sense. That this early potty training only actually sounds crazy to the western world. That you tune into your child and watch facial expressions and noises to know when they need to relieve themselves.

So I started with Mavisu yesterday...and havn't had time to write about it...

life is different these days...been trying to finish this blog entry for days!!! but i am a new momma who can't seem to find the time and must learn to do all things one handed!!! love it but is a whole new world!!!!!!

i'm tired...will go into detail later about how it is going...my baby using the potty...

note: her leg warmers for easy diaper on and off...ohhh she is cute!

Mehmet Ali...

Seni seviyoruz!

Seni ozliyoruz!

My dear father-in-law passed on October 25th 2009. He had a long battle with lung cancer that had metastasized to his brain.

Thank you for your beautiful son!













Mavisu's two grandpa angels!

I am so glad they met and we all had a good time together before this craziness all happened!

As my mom pointed out...hopefully my dad and Ali are in heaven together playing Tavla(backgammon) where language is not a problem. Smiling down on us!

They will be missed everyday but thank you for your legacy!

We cherish the memories and thank you for what you left behind in us all!

sharp, surprising stab in the back...

First off thinking and praying for my dearest auntie godmother who had a double mastectomy yesterday...Dearest Auntie I love you more than words! You are so special, kind, giving, thoughtful, selfless and wonderful! A true inspiration...you don't need boobs to be any of those things:) I promise to have a petite syrah and lentil soup ready to aid in a speedy recovery.

FUCK CANCER (sorry but swearing is necessary sometimes!)

As far as thoughts of my father we still are going through the motions, living life and able to laugh and talk about dad but then it(the reality of his absence) sneaks up behind you and stabs you in the back...but as my mom said that is good. We need to feel it.

The most recent tear-jerker was this morning, a card from my great-aunt Audrey who lives in Arizona:

My most outstanding memory of Kim is when he met me at the airport after Dayton died(my father's father). He greeted me with a big hug and his famous smile, and I thought:"I bet he learned to show warmth that way from Theresa(mom)." Us Johnsons, my generation and previous ones for sure, were pretty much taught not be very demonstrative. So I thank you for your love for him and for helping him and will always remember him that way. He really made me feel like family.

So thank you Aunt Audrey for the note and for keeping in touch! Very special!


The above photo is from when my mom and dad came to Turkey to check out this other life. It makes my heart so happy that my dad got to meet the future in-laws and see just what I have been living. It one thing to hear about places but a whole other to experience them.

My dad's neck had gotten really cramped from his first really long plane trip. Well at the time we blamed the trip but in hindsight we wonder if it had to do with the cancer? I was helping support his neck so he could see the beautiful domed ceilings at the Hagia Sophia mosque/church(a must when you all come visit us in Istanbul:).We were laughing away of course.

The one time I could support my dad. He loved and supported us countless unasked times. I realize now something I sort of took for granted, the solid rock, supportive roots that was my father. But now I ask myself "WWKD" -What Would KAJMAN Do? How would my father do it? It helps.

I was inspired to post this pic since my dear seester has a photo of her and dad on facebook. It is good to be reminded even though it hurts.

Thanks to all for sharing stories they mean a lot to us. Never forget.

Girlfriends...

Two of my best girlfriends came to town this weekend. It was amazing and we didn't have to do anything.

Girlfriend sessions are so necessary. It is a counseling session filled with giggles. So good for the soul!

We thought of our San Diego lives when the world revolved around only us and just hanging out together. Now so much has changed; a world not just for us, marriage, birth, death, travels, moves, new houses.

We are in such different times in our lives but it comforts my soul to know we will always be friends no matter how many miles apart we are. That our next generation will have some wonderful aunties! Although I wish I could put you in my pocket and pull you out whenever I need you.

Thankyou for coming my darlings!

Also thank you to my mother's wonderful girlfriends/sisters that have helped her and us all so much through these tough times! You are such special ladies! I worry so much less about my mother's heart hurting when I think of you!

Melt my heart...

I love sleep. I am just a person that requires a full 8 hours to function. My father could get by on 4 and I always was amazed by that.

Being a new mom who is breast feeding you do not get that straight 8 hours. You wake up every 3 or so hours a night to feed your child. Sometimes I hear here start to fuss at 3AM. I think just five more minutes please...but then I awake and look down at my adorable little girl that is so dependent on me and I wake right up.

She recently started smiling...and that is what really melts my heart! I am yet to capture it on film but oh my goodness...melt my heart!

Fall...

It is fall in MN. Normally in mine and I believe many Minnesotans opinion the best time of the year with squash, pumpkins, apples, crisp fresh air...













And of course the colorful leaves, reds, yellows, oranges and everything in between. The most gorgeous as the sun shines through warming the crisp air.

Minnesotans know that you really have to get ready for the long cold winter though. Unfortuanatly it might be coming earlier than normal this year but we hope to get another warm spell!

Mom and I readied the gardens. Picking the carrots and beets. Tearing out tomato plants. Harvesting the herbs and honey crisp apples(probably the best apples I have ever had!)all before the EARLY snow we are supposed to get.

Gardening and working outside is so therapeutic. The smells of the soil and the fresh crisp air in your lungs.

Most Minnesotans are busy canning or freezing their gardens right now. My aunties and sister made salsa. So much you can do to preserve the garden delights for winter; canning, freezing and pickling are a few.

I have previously written about Turkish Turşuci, The pickle man. They pickle anything and everything in Turkey and have whole fabulous shops dedicated to this art. I recently came across and article through Istanbul Eats from Today's Zaman about the best Turşu in Turkey and even how to make it yourself...so for those of you drooling over the thought of pickled everything check out the article here and make some yourself...


















We had our little Mavisu Pumpkin Lovely out for some sunshine and fresh air. My darling Turkish in-laws might be upset to think she was out in the cold but I promise she was bundled up tight and I am being a good mommy. I love her more everyday! We miss her Baba (Daddy) though!

Floating on...

Life goes on...

My mother describes it as "being on autopilot." You just continue even though it just constantly feels like something is missing, like it isn't real.

Even though I am not constantly thinking about how my father is gone it is constantly with me...subconsciously...in the back of my head...a fog...then bam...it hits...I see a photo or think of something I would want to ask him..."Dad, how do you blah blah blah with the computer?" etc. etc...I loose my breathe...I get sick to my stomach...He was a wealth of knowledge plus so much more...and he is gone.

My brother describes it as a "Hole." A hole that will always be with us.
A hole that can't be filled and will be there forever.

It still just feels like a dream. How can he be gone? When is he going to come home? When is he going to walk through the door again smiling? How can we do it without our constant? He was always there for all of us; my mother, two sisters, brother and I...always...no questions asked.

I worry about us all but especially my mother. I know she will be fine, she is so strong! She has a wonderful extended family and so many friends to support her but it just isn't the same. She told me the other day she truely understands what heartache means and how it feels. She says she can handle that life will be harder with out my father. They took care of each other for so long...he did certain things and she did others...but she just thinks about how lonesome she will be...my heartaches for my father and then it aches more thinking of my mother's heartaching...

Mavisu turned 1 month old on the 4th. She helps us all so much. Her new little life. Why is it you can just stare at babies and be completely entertained?

Our journey from Turkey to America was a long one. My husband had a driver pick us up in Didim and drive us to him in Eskisehir, 7 hours. Then from Eskisehir to Ankara, 3 hours to get mavisu's emergency passport all while faxing papers and trying to prove my citizenship so she could get her passport, grieving. We got it, then back to eskisehir...drove to Istanbul,4-5 hours to fly out...flew from Istanbul to Chicago, 11 hours with Mavisu in her little bag. She was such a good girl. Then Chicago to Minneapolis, 1 hour. But whatever...you just do it...more autopilot...

Greeted with hugs, kisses and crys. But where is dad? He always picks me up at the airport? Shit...

In the month since Mavisu has been born...she becomes more precious everyday...She is opening her beautiful little eyes for longer, she has gained over a pound, plumb healthy little baby fat, she is getting more facial expressions and can focus on your face now. She is getting strong, holding her neck up, bobbing her head.

We are going to stay in MN until after christmas. It was my beautiful husbands idea, to share his wife and new baby with his mother-in-law. He knew she needs us for a while. I don't think he realized just how hard it would be for him...so hard...but he is selfless...wonderful and thoughtful...he will visit us soon and thank you god for skype.

So for now we are all floating on( check out the Modest Mouse song) covered by a fog, hearts aching but so thankful for all our memories, other blessings, each other and all the kind words, stories, cards, gifts that have been shared. Our father's legacy.

Happy 34th Anniversary...

“The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” -David O. McKay

And love her he has!

Our father passed away this morning at 1:30AM Minnesota time(9:30 AM Turkey). My sister said his breathing became labored and they understood the end was near so my mother climbed into bed with him. He passed away next to his life-long love. He waited until their Anniversary, today September 13th my mother and father have been married for 34 years. He waited...

Thank you megs and mom for writing on the caring bridge site...it has helped so much, my distance to read and thank you everyone for visiting it and sharing stories about how wonderful my father is...uhhh was...so hard...

Thank you for waiting to have the funeral service when we get there...I need it...I need to grieve together with you all...I need to cry together and laugh together..hear the stories...tell the stories...with my family...with all that know and love everything beautiful about our KAJman!

Although I will forever regret not physically having said goodbye to you dad I know you would understand it all. You have always been rational and supportive...even of this big move...you have always thought we have good opportunities in this developing country of Turkey. I am so glad you and mom made it here last year. ohhh but it is just so far...still...how did it happen so fast? We know you didn't want to be the sick guy in the corner ever though...

Should have, would have, could have...what if they would have found it sooner...what if you would of stopped smoking years ago...what if...stop.

You would love your granddaughter so much and you will from afar be her protective angel. As my brother said, "You tag teamed...mavisu in and you out", you overlapped...thank god she came early! You will always be connected and she will hear how wonderful you were and it will inspire her...inspire her to be her own unique person...kind and considerate of others...strong and opinionated...happy and smile in knowing that family is so important. I am going to raise her well, as I was so fortunate to have been with help of her beautiful father who I know you approved of and that means so much! You always said Çağlar would have his own private jet one day, my entrepreneur...if only it was now:)

Now every time I look at a computer, see a picture, see diet coke, chocolate, etc. so many things I will think of you and for now it will make the tears flow but I am so much better for having known you...thank you for being you my wonderful, special father!

I love you forever father dear...xoxoxo...thank you for everything...

I promise to take the best care of your granddaughter...we now all draw strength from her new life!

"If I could"...

Our beautiful daughter was born healthy 9 days early on September 4th, 2009 at 10:40 AM Turkish time. She was born 3.25 kilos(7.2 lbs) and 20 inches long. She is gorgeous and we are so in love with her and feel so blessed!

At the same time across the ocean my father is dying...

My father-in-law has been sick with cancer for the past year, since last August. We moved to Didim to be closer to him during his last days.

Some days when I would get frustrated by this Turkish life my mother would remind me, "what if it was your dad, What would you want to do?" and I would agree that I would have to be next to him. To celebrate his life, to be together with the family as we have been with my in-laws...

But in some sick twist of fate it is my father that is the sick one...some how since his diagnosis on June 15th, only three months ago(another sick twist of fate that diagnosis came 2 days after I left Minnesota from my month long visit and how can two grandpas both be sick with cancer?) my father went from having kidney cancer with a good prognosis, a really good chance to make it through, he was working in the yard and out socializing, to this last week having gotten so weak with the cancer having spread absolutely everywhere eating him from the inside out that when I see him from skype it doesn't even look like my father anymore???

We have done all this waiting and circling for my father-in-law expecting him to pass and now it IS my own father that is going to leave us prematurely...

how? why? It is all happening too fast!

I will tell our daughter so many stories...about how beautiful her grandpa was(I can't believe I have to start using past tense...it is so wrong)...how kind, intelligent, quirky and wonderful. How he would help anyone who needed it but was especially always there for his family; my mother and us four kids.

I know he understood when I called and said I was going into labor and I think he understood the first day we came back from the hospital...his first granddaughter was born...and she is perfect!

I have been listening to music for days straight just nursing our daughter and spending time with my new little family between skype calls with my family in Minnesota and have been moved by this Jack Johnson song..."If I could"

Here it is on Youtube

A brand new baby was born yesterday
Just in time
Papa cried, baby cried
Said "Your tears are like mine"
I heard some words
From a friend on the phone
That didn't sound so good
The doctor gave him two weeks to live
I'd give him more if I could

You know that I would now
If only I could
You know that I would now
If only I could

Down the middle drops one more
Grain of sand
They say that
New life makes losing life easier to understand
Words are kind
They helped ease the mind
I'll miss my old friend
And though you gotta go
We'll keep a piece of your soul
One goes out
One comes in

You know that I would now
If only I could
You know that I would now
If only I could


You know that I would now, be there if I could my dear father...I love you so much!

We are trying to make our way as quickly as we can, getting a passport for our daughter. We need to make sure she won't get sick on the plane with the recycled air and germs. Anyone want to loan us their private jet?

She is the most important now, this new little life...

Must save moisture for milk not tears...

Irony or karma?

I have another column out in Voices Newspaper entitled "Whose Holding Their Hands?". In the column I muse about our first times in Eskişehir with the student exchange. The contradiction between extreme hospitality but feeling like we were going to get taken out by a car any minute.

I am not sure if it is irony or karma that the day I bought the newspapers to check on my printed article...I was waddling out of a store ın a pregancy ınduced haze where we had bought some new sheets, annoyed at how expensive our sheets were, blindly following my husband to the car when someone was parallel parking and hit me with the car...don't worry it was a slight tap...but ohhh I was angry. The man apologized and I started balling(reminder 38 weeks prego) and my husband told me that I am the one that needs to be careful and that I need to watch where I am going...well I was pissed at this comment and I am huge how could one not see me? The tears were flowing at this point. I got over it but what do you think...ironic I had just written about this or karma for musing about another culture? Or maybe just proves my point...read my column and open your third and fourth eyes! Pregnancy haze is no excuse...

The next part of my column talks about the ONE test university system of Turkey. Although the system is wonderful for the students that pass the test and is very inexpensive they don't leave options for the rest of the population. I think in the states we are very lucky to have the community and technical colleges as an option for preparing for university or just taking a few classes to improve a skill or just for the sake of learning, also for older students. Unfortunately it sounds like right now the university system is cutting classes left and right and so many teachers are out of work. My old teacher writes about these issues often at her blog, Kloe among the Turks.

Obama just passed a $12 billion initiative for community colleges...Hope it works out...don't forget how important the teachers are!!!!

Here is an interesting program from the U.S. Department of State community college initiative for foreign students...


The photo is of Hubby and I on our Kayak...it is so great!

37 weeks...

I am now 37 weeks pregnant. I am big...my belly is big, my breasts are big, my moles are big, my hands are big, my feet are big, my hips feel big, my emotions are big...my memory is small though(I have the pregnancy brain- uh what was I doing?)

We are ready to meet our child, to kiss her, to smell her, to see what a mixture of our two families she looks like. Her due date is September 13th(my beautiful parents anniversary). Of course only like 5% of babies come on the due date and time does fly!

I am also ready to have my body back. Although I still have some fear for the laboring process especially in this foreign land I am also so pregnant and everything hurts just a little from carrying around 12 extra kilos(26 pounds). And really I never knew one could pee so often...

I moan when I get up, I ache when I go down, I waddle everywhere and I can't do most things myself anymore. A painter came yesterday so the ceiling are no longer chipping away and a cleaning women came today to help with the mess and give us a full sweep through to get us ready. I am stubborn and still think I can do it myself- then I try to bend down- lots of grunting and heavy breathing-forget about it- give in to the help! Thank goodness the cleaning women came because I started trying to clean myself yesterday(with the help of hubby)but I am hurting because of it today.

My husband knows my tone, the way I say his name when I have a project for him. Because although my memory is impaired, my list writing skills are very keen right now! My list, his list, our list:) He is a trooper and he knows how to make me laugh when I want to cry:)

It is good that baby growing takes so long, 10 months, why do they say 9? You have a while to get used to the idea. I quickly got over the initial shock of "oh my goodness we are pregnant" and have gone through many stages currently having progressed to the "We are so excited to meet her and now please give me my body back!"

Anyone know of an actual massage therapist in Didim? I wish...

Most important of all this is please just let our child come healthy...her mommy can hold out, "take one for the team" (yes, me in third person) and really I have been really fortunate to have had a healthy pregnancy just these last few days I have been feeling so big!

old post...marriage

 

I am going back through all my old posts labeling...not fun...advice is to label from the beginning but found this old post about before we got married in Turkey June 2008.

So here's my old post and mark my words we are still going to have our wedding party in America! It will just include a meet our little daughter part also!(two years later) This post is from when I was debating on whether or not to make my blog personal. Well I definitely open it right up...

When I started this blog I wanted to keep it about some of my experiences in Turkey but to not get too personal but here goes...

So we did it! We got married, my beautiful Turk and I. I have been on hiatus from the blog, not sure what I want to add. The above photo is of where I got my wedding dress. It was a surreal whirlwind experience of planning this party in two days. We were just going to go to the government building-justice of the peace style and have a party later. It is hard both having amazing friends and families but in different countries and on such short notice. Caglar's friend regretted not having a party and his family never forgave him so he took it upon himself to plan. His friend took us to the old shopping center and the top floor is only wedding dresses but Turkish wedding dresses with fluff and flouff and glitter and polyester and layers upon layers upon fake flowers and glitter and ruffles. It ties to my earlier blog entry of Delightfully tacky...

My dress turned out to be beautiful though. I kept saying to keep it small, less poof. I tried on a few and then found a beautiful one, initially didn't zip up the back so the women just tore out the zipper and put in a lace up back, like on a corset. We had our clothes and were ready for the ceremony.

Ramazan başlıdı

Ramazan in Turkish, Ramadan in other Muslim cultures started yesterday. This festival lasts a month where devotees fast from the first Azan, call to pray at sunrise to the last Azan, at sunset. Very strict Muslims fast food, drinks even water, cigarettes, sex, everything in excess and then are allowed food once the sun sets. Some even wake up before the sun rises to quick get a bite in before the long day of fasting.

My husband and family don't practice this tradition which I am happy for because it just seems so intense! There are lots of angry people driving around during these days; hot, hungry and not smoking cigarettes.

Often times more moderate Muslim people choose one thing to give up, similar to Lent in Catholicism. Our neighbor has given up alcohol for a month, a little detox. The fasting practice is to teach patience, modesty and spirituality...ok I can understand that.

But with Ramazan fasting happening all around me I want to talk food! There are tons of special breads and dishes only made around this time I need to learn more about.


















My previous post I described my creative hiatus. My lack of completing painting, drawing etc but I realized I have been cooking lots of yummy things!

Turkey has so many beautiful fresh fruits and vegetables. In Didim the pazaar happens every Saturday and gives so much to work with especially in the summer months. Everything is seasonal and grown in Turkey except the Chiquita bananas.

Cooking here takes creativity because I don't have all the ingredients for my recipes but it has definitely caused me to become more in touch with the food and flavors. Instead of just following the recipe I improvise alot!

My new favorite website is Jamie Oliver's, The cute English "naked chef".

Anyone know of any other great cooking sites?

Handmade...

Yes, I have been writing. That is something creative at least...yes, I have the excuse of very hot and very pregnant but it has been over a year since I made something I really loved...completed something. Time to get in gear! Stop the excuses!

I decided I would post some old work to get the juices flowing until I create something new. I need to touch, to feel, to think, to create again! I graduated with an art degree for goodness sake!

The above is a tapestry I made while attending Mimar Sinan Universitesi in Istanbul. It from a photograph of my husband's and my feet on a ferry trip coming back from the Princess Islands in Istanbul. Great day; love, bicycles, ferries...

I have been quite inspired by two creative blogging sisters, one at The light garden and the other at eighty days design who both sell their work along with tons of other talented artists creating beautiful handmade items at Etsy:Your place to buy and sell all things handmade!

I do miss all my materials back in MN! My good godmother is storing them in her basement awaiting our return; my sewing machine, big tackle box of beads, book making materials, nice paper, pencils, pastels, a whole college career's work etc. etc.

As Verity at thelightgarden was musing it far more difficult to find materials in Turkey but especially in Didim! But people make things with all sorts of materials though so another part of the creative process! Recently I've been reading about several women in many countries, Turkey included creating and selling hand bags out of plastic garbage.

My sweet husband did find me an easel, few canvases and acrylics. He brought it home stuffed in the little Volkswagen to surprise me, wooden legs sticking out the windows! He is very supportive. He calls me, "my Art" and I just don't ever want to correct him to- my artist:)


















Here is my new favorite piece of handmade! Our quilted elephant bedspread that I found at the pazaar! The pazaar is packed with amazing fruits and vegetables but unfortunately the rest is mainly cheap plastic crap and fake "Prada" and "Adidas"...But I spyed this beauty and look forward to adding more to our room along the theme! Turkey has a rich history of handmade.

A painter is coming on Monday to repaint the ceilings; the cement houses hold moisture and has caused the paint to flake all over the floor daily, although we painted a few months ago???? Not good for our beautiful (almost here) baby or us but after that I can finally officially set up my tiny studio!!!!!!

Write about creative...be creative!

Big top in Didim!

This wasn't Barnum and Baileys Big Top nor Cirque de Soleil...it was...Uluslararası Avrasya Sirk- The International Eurasian Circus. The performers were from Mongolia and it's bordering countries East of Turkey, south of Russia but before China. I read about it in the local paper and was eager to go. There is just something so magical and yet so scary about circuses. This one didn't disappoint on either level, ghetto fabulous for sure!!! I had initial fears there might be old mistreated animals but thankfully just enthusiastic performers.

It was also an opportunity to use our new Nikon D60 Camera. I still needs lots of practice and a lesson or six. What setting for the best photos at night? Also when there is lots of action...performers flipping around? Advice is very welcome!


















We were some of the first there...front row chair baby, 15TL compared to 5TL for the backless stools farther back. My pregnant self was feeling fortunate for the backrest on my plastic chair! The above photo is an example of that scarier side of the circus. You had to pay 5TL to ride up and then come back down on that little swinging chair in the middle of the big top. The kids that rode had a look of fear rather than excitement! I am definitely one for adventure but it looked quite precarious even for me!

Actually, the whole circus initially looked quite dubious and seemed to age as we waited for the show to start! It conjured up images and nostalgia for the old circuses of the 1930's America with their freak shows and claims of "the greatest show on earth". This train of thought was broken by the pre-show mix of music they were playing, the Peurto Rican Regatone song, Gasolina! Yeah holla! Shout out to my girl, Aly(tried to text you:)

It was one of those international moments when I remember how small this big world is getting; me an American, 9 months pregnant with my Turkish husband in Turkey watching a Mongloian circus and listening to Puerto Rican Regatone surrounded by a crowd of Turkish covered women and English holiday makers.

Our nephew came with great enthusiasm for it was his first time at a circus. He was slightly nervous about the clowns but he did great.













Then the lights dimmed, the song switched and the performers popped out from behind the thick red plastic curtain. Their energy winding us all up, there costumes shocks of florescent polyester, heads bopping curly clown wigs. Running, dancing, clapping, smiling, cartwheeling, jump roping balls of energy! The show had begun...


















They had it all(except for aging or mistreated animals which I was glad for!). Next was an aging acrobat who twisted by her teeth high in the sky. This act was impressive and during her performance she was all smiles and showmanship but I later saw her selling clown noses and hats and the smile was gone...not happy with that new job. There were audience participation pieces, a guy balancing several stacks of glasses(my hubby was unimpressed by this one), contortionist twin like team (very impressive), comic clown relief, a strong man with his pretty entourage, a trapeze girl wrapped in ribbon, tumbling men holding amazing poses, a magic act, a tight rope show...


















hula hupper, fire throwers and one eater(we were a little nervous at this part honestly...spitting flammable fluids...remember we were ringside) with two big boas. It was a great little ghetto fabulous circus, a little rough around the edges but packed with lots of talent!

I kept wondering how the performers came into that life? The acrobats of the group seemed like possibly family with one coach/dad type figure? Were they born into the circus life? I guess I will never know...

The Office

I am so happy that channel 2- Comedy max on digiturk started playing my favorite show, The Office! They play two episodes back to back! My husband likes to watch it with me but not for the actual show which I don't think the sarcasm or subtleties translate over into Turkish but to hear my loud laugh...so funny!!!!! The little things I miss...but this no more!

Our Gezgin Cafe in Sahte Cennet

We have slowly been adding to our family owned and operated Gezgin Cafe, Traveler's cafe since we opened last October. We are located in Sahte Cennet area between Didim and Akbük. You just follow the big road running parrellel to the sea that takes you from Didim to Akbük. Follow the "Y" to the right, continuing down the road past Uslu sitesi, past Çamkent Sitesi, go right again at the next "Y" and past Adnan Menderes Universitesi. There will be a strip of cafes. We are the 4th one down...keep a look out for our blue direction pointer! It is before the big Club Sahte Cennet.


















We still have lots of Turkish and English books and magazines as well as games; Monopoly, Uno, Jenga, lots of Tavla(backgammon) of course and more! We recently purchased new, even comfier white cushioned benches with tables. Come in and relax! We are open all year but the garden is the place to be at this time of the year!













Here is our bar...the Efes draft is always cold and to give it that extra chill we have frosted mugs ready in the freezer! We also have bottled beer, Efes and Miller light if you prefer. We have a cappuccino machine also ready to make espressos, lattes and cappuccinos. We have a full bar with vodka, gin, whiskey, tequila and scotch. A full array of mixers; red bull, soda, fruit juices and colas. Things for the kiddies too...


















We have gourmet Carte d'Or ice cream. The flavors are always changing and everyone has their favorite; walnut, pistachio, lemon, Mulberry, Strawberry, cappuccino, chocolate to name a few!


















Lots of hammocks, big pillows, lounge chairs and benches for relaxing or just taking a break from swimming!













Our beach is perfect for swimming! The water is very shallow, calm and clean! It is nice break from Altinkum because it is not so crowded, which I love! Kids welcome also!


















Also we have the best trees on the block. My favorite is the beautiful pine tree on the left. A wonderful natural umbrella from the hot sun. We have a sound system out under the trees with relaxing music during the day for sun lounging and snacking then more up-beat music at night...













Good for a little dancing under the pine tree!













Night is the best to be outside in the summer! The weather is perfect right next to the sea! Relax, chat, and have a cocktail with your friends! We love all sizes of groups. We have had sünnets, birthdays, anniversaries and can accommodate any parties you would like! I am always checking my email so leave your contact info or call the cafe directly...I will write the info at the end.













Lots of fun to be had! Come visit us at Our Gezgin Cafe in Sahte Cennet...

Fevzipaşa mah. Cennet cad. No:7/35
Didim/ Aydin

Tel: 0.256.846.2218

Check my blog's labels on the right for "Our Gezgin Cafe" to read more about our remodeling story! My husband and I worked really hard with lots of help and some funny stories!

Food pictures to come later! We have homemade Köfte(meatballs) with chips(french fries), Gözleme(Turkish crepes) with cheese or potatoes inside, Töst (grilled cheese sandwiches) and Turkish kavaltı(breakfast with tomatoes, cucumbers, olives, cheese, an egg, bread and jam)

"Have you seen my rose-tinted glasses?"

Hubby and I went on a little adventure yesterday to Kuşadasi to visit some friends. We toured in our new to us- used Suzuki Samurai(yes friends so similar to my old tracker just white instead of pink). We nicknamed it Kangaroo because it bounces so much...our unborn child was not happy about this! Don't ride in bouncy cars for an extended period of time when you are 8 plus months pregnant- not ok! But we made it safely back with the help of several breaks and no premature labor thank goodness!

In Turkey gas(petrol) is about 3TL per LITER. Which means there are 3.785411 liters per Gallon in USA and 4.54609 liters per gallon from UK. So 3TL x 3.785411= 11.36TL per gallon / dollar exchange rate of $1.4 = $8.11 per gallon. So my darling Americans when u get sad or frustrated by gas prices just remember the rest of the world has it much more expensive! So people explore other methods like Tüplu, natural gas to run the car. Our little samurai has a black cylinder in the trunk where you fill it with natural gas and it only costs 1.68TL per Liter. I was initially worried about the safety of this method but my father assured me it is a great developing technology, our Tüplu araba.

Also my most recent column is out from Voices newspaper. My search to find balance between my love and dislike of everything Turkish in "HAVE YOU SEEN MY ROSE-TINTED GLASSES?"

P.S. I have changed my site address from www.ohhhsweetturkey.blogspot.com to just www.ohhhsweeturkey.com. So for those of you who have this site bookmarked you might want to modify it- thanks for reading!

Deniz Börülcesi= Aegean seaweed

This is a delicious treat, Deniz Börülcesi! A seaweed named glaswort when I translate to English through Tureng online Turkish/English dictionary.

You boil it until soft. Drain but save a little of the water. You then strip the fleshy green part from the branches. It is a bit of a tedious process but well worth it! Then combine the fleshy greens, the salty water from boiling, olive oil and lemon. Great side dish especially for fish but great on it's own too!

Also congrats to my darling little brother and dear friend on their wedding! Wish we were there and wish you all the love in the world! Brazil 2010 though!

Birthing in Turkey update...

Thanks to all who have commented and validated my birthing fears from the previous post. It means a lot to read the comments of encouragement and advice.

My fears have lessened though. We toured the local hospital. Although it is not glamorous at all. It is clean. One of the midwives gave us a tour. Although she doesn't speak English she seemed nice enough. I saw the room where you start laboring in. I am going to take the advice to labor at home as long as possible! It is small with two beds but there is a bath tub in the bathroom which I was excited about and a non-Turkish toilet!!! There may be another laboring women in there with me or may not depending on timing of course. I made sure to ask if I was allowed to move around if I wanted. Midwife said that was fine.

When you fully go into labor you are moved to another big open room. It has a big yellow chair with stirrups(reminded me slightly of a torture chair but trying not to think like that). I am a little nervous because she said there is no pain medicine available until after the birth. But my mom said she didn't have any and if she can do it so can I-hopefully(errr)!

When the baby comes she will be kept with me which is really important to me. After the baby is born together you are moved to a third room with several beds and watched for 6 hours. Your husband is allowed in for this.

Then as long as everything has gone well and you and baby dear are healthy you are moved to a private room where you, your husband and new baby can sleep the night and again as long as everything looks good you go home the next day.

We asked the midwife if my husband could be there for the birth and she said it was the doctors decision. So we went back down to see my doctor. She approved that my husband could come in for the delivery and possibly my mother-in-law also!!! Thank goodness!!!!!!!! I am not sure if it was the previous balling that did it or what? She really has been a good doc though. She has a very modern private practice it is just the State Hospital that leaves something to be desired!

For me this equaled relief. I was ready to go searching long and hard but I think it will be ok? Even if the hospital isn't very glamorous as I said at least I will have some support through the ordeal.

This whole experience so far has brought up so many questions?

Why wouldn't men be allowed in? Actually anyone else at all?

I ASSUMED it was considering this is a predominantly Muslim country and since it is a shared birthing room that men wouldn't be able to see someone that wasn't their wife or something?

But my husband said it is because recently in Turkey there have been a few outbreaks in hospitals that lead to infant deaths. Here is one article from Daily Zaman...one outbreak in Bursa.

Neither reasons are very comforting...

Also for the record this rule isn't at every hospital across Turkey but my husband reminds me that we live in a village, more like a resort town, but anyways it is small. In Istanbul or another big city there are more options.

I think it also has to do with expectations. Maybe Turkish women don't expect their husbands to be there. They just assume the doctor knows what is going on? I have been reading that Turkey has a bad reputation for a very mechanical births and quick to give cesareans. But as America did for years but then women started wanting more from their birthing experience.

Maybe the doctors don't necessarily want frantic husbands in the room who are worried about their wives being in so much pain especially since there are soooo few birthing classes so people haven't been educated on how to deal with the pain, the breathing, the process, how to help and not just be in the way?

I have thought about going to Bodrum for the birth to Özel Bodrum Hastanesi. I have an English friend here who chose that hospital and feels good about it. They have an English nurse thereö Sarah Aslanç My husband is worried that he wouldn't be able to drive me there in time and then we would have the baby in the car and would have to name her Bodrum...he's funny:)

But we have been trying to self educate and now he realizes that laboring takes a long time.

I have been directed to a few resources for natural birth/classes/doula type things in Turkey...

For one there is a yahoo health forum group...naturalbirthturkey

There is one American Doula who sounds wonderful named Julia Steils who I wish I could meet with but we are too far from Istanbul. Her site is http://www.fullcirclehealing.org.

The other is a Turkish Doctor named Dr. Hakan Çoker who practices out of Maramaris,teaching lamaze which is also a bit far for us but i am waiting to hear back from him if he has some weekend classes. His site is www.dogaldogum.com.

If that doesn't work I am going to try to get a lamaze video from Amazon or something...but the mail always takes so long??? What to do?

For now I am feeling better and again thanks for the advice and support...

More to come...she will be here so soon!

boat trips...

One thing I love about Turkey in the summer are the boat trips you can take. Turkey is in a unique geographic position where it is surrounded by three seas. Kara deniz(black sea to the north, Ege deniz(aegean sea) to the west and Ak Deniz (Mediterranean Sea) to the south. Most seaside cities have a daily boat trip or tons. The photo above was taken from the Polis Kamp beach in Didim and as you can see there are various sizes and adventures for your liking. Some are for relaxing, swimming, and site seeing others are loud party tours, others scuba diving and you can also rent private boats for a day or several days to tour the coasts. All depending from which city you start from. We have gone on ones before from Kaş, another in Fethiye.


















Most recently a scuba diving trip out of Bodrum.













My favorite are the wooden sail boats, pirate ships. My husband and I dream of having one...some day! Family- when you all come some day- it will happen we can rent one for a few days and sail around the coast. Also to "my girls" I plan to do this with you all some day too!


















My cute hubby getting ready for his first dive.


















Learning...













Beautiful secluded coastlines.


















Too pregnant to scuba dive but enjoying the ride.